YOU CAN’T BEAT THE HOUSE – by Pat Cook
Two minor-league burglars decide to break into a house only to find that it’s up for sale. Before they can leave, prospective buyers show up. Merle begins to show the house, but then the real agent shows up and Merle has to juggle the couple and the agent. Things really go wrong when the cop shows up and Madame Zenobia appears. Oh! By the way, the house is haunted.
Great fun and great laughs!
Production dates: April 28, 29, May 5, and 6 at 7:30 PM and April 30 and May 7 at 2:00 PM
Audition dates March 3 from 3-5 PM and March 6 from 6-8 PM. You may check out a script in the office at The Sermon Center for $10.00 which will be returned to you when you bring the script back.
Cast of Characters:
Merle: An amiable but not very good burglar
Howie: Merle’s partner who thinks with his heart
Conrad Spears: Young married man, given to arguing
Glenda Spears: Conrad’s wife, a woman with a secret
Courtney Parfait: A well-coifed real estate agent
Officer Milo Larraby: A not-to-bright police officer
Lillian: Glenda’s pushy mother
Madame Zenobia: A wise-cracking spiritual medium
Brittany Marie: Conrad’s dumb secretary
Fern Larraby: Larraby’s crabby mother